Morpheus XV – March 18, 2016

Top of the mornin’, to ya! Morpheus is well into the Irish spirit after an evening spent with Erin Go-Bra-less, and warm cheap beer while partying at the Swim house. That’s right, St. Patrick’s Day fell upon CU yesterday and in the grand spirit of the holiday, everyone was plastered and skipped their classes like good children. Be sure to go to Confession today, kiddos!

A lot has happened this past week! Oh, dear! Uncle Morph almost forgot to apologize for his absence last week. Fear not, dear readers, he is back in full swing.

To begin, Morpheus was reading the Post this past week and read about the law suit with the School of Architecture. Naughty, naughty Dean! Rumor has it, the Dean of the School sent rather nasty emails to our old professor. Morpheus surely hopes that isn’t so. Morph also can’t help but to wonder where the million dollars will come from to pay the complainant. Maybe we can plant a money tree in the middle of the basketball courts of CV, or the new university drive way.

In other news, rumor also has it that Brett Beringer and Sean Calabria are running for SGA president and vice? Well, well, well… Ms. St. Amant and Mr. Benedek just couldn’t keep their fingers out of the pie, could they?

Morpheus begs his readers to contact him with juicy CU news and gossip. As always, be careful and be aware, because at CU, Moroheus Q. sees you!