What Your Favorite Garvey Hall Omelet Ingredient Says About You -

By Anthony Curioso

This is an independently submitted op-ed and does not reflect the views of The Tower.

Garvey Hall, the all-you-can-eat dining hall on the CUA campus, attracts many visitors to the building during breakfast and lunch service times to enjoy an omelet (which was previously only available during breakfast). In my prior ranking of the Garvey Hall stations, I mentioned that my sole reason for ranking the Grill station as highly as I did was due to the delicious omelets.

I believe that you can gather a lot of information about a person based on their food preferences, regardless of the specific food(s) being discussed. I will now apply this logic to the various ingredients available for ordering in an omelet at Garvey Hall.

Regardless of what other ingredients you add to your omelet, shredded cheese is a requirement, and I must judge you if you leave it out of your omelet order (with the obvious exception of those unfortunate souls who have dairy allergies). When the cheese melts, it helps hold all the other ingredients together, so you can at least attempt to eat your omelet without making a mess.

An omelet is often incomplete without some meat inside, as the meat serves as another added source of protein. However, of the two types of meat available in Garvey Hall omelets, only one is genuinely worth requesting, so if it is not available, you are better off not getting any meat in your omelet at all.

If you order an omelet with ham, I must look at you with silent scorn. Ham goes well in some dishes, but an omelet is not one of those, as the ham completely disrupts the taste of the eggs and other ingredients in the omelet.

If you order an omelet with bacon, you are making a better choice for added protein. The saltiness of the bacon complements the other ingredients in the omelet, whereas the type of ham used in Garvey Hall omelets lacks that same flavor.

Adding tomatoes to your omelet suggests that you have extremely niche answers to give every time someone asks you for your favorite of anything – from movies, to music artists, to books. I have never even once seen anyone order an omelet in Garvey Hall that featured tomatoes.

If you add jalapenos to your omelet, you are attempting to find a way to spice up your life after everything else you’ve tried to achieve this goal has failed miserably.

I firmly believe that only people who genuinely enjoy green bell peppers and would eat them raw if given the opportunity would add them to their omelets. They are also your preferred pizza topping, in which case, I have a lot of respect for you, even if I disagree.

If you enjoy spinach in your omelets, you don’t really care if it ends up stuck in your teeth, which is most likely going to happen at some point.

Mushrooms are one of the most versatile ingredients and go well in almost anything savory; omelets are no exception. As such, people who enjoy mushrooms in their omelets are likely among the popular crowd, and have been so for as long as people typically care about that sort of thing – but that’s okay.

Lastly, people who enjoy onions in their omelets are likely to want to eat them in other contexts and are the type of individuals who scoff at the notion that others don’t enjoy onions. I will fully admit to fitting in this category.