“The Huddled Masses”

Guest Commentary
Nicholas Rao
Class of 2018

“SGA Votes in Favor of a Smoke-Free Campus”. It’s nice to know that SGA has been spending its time productively. How better to further the common good of the campus than to alienate 25 percent of the student body, not to mention countless faculty and staff who smoke? Why not a “caffeine-free” campus for good measure – or an all-inclusive “vice-free” campus, wherein students, faculty and staff alike are liberated from their sundry faults and flaws by the enlightened resolutions of SGA?

I have always found the phrase “smoke-free” amusing. In a country so phobic about infringing on the normative values and lifestyle choices of individuals, some missionaries feel nonetheless entitled to proclaim the masses in bondage to the corrupting influence of tobacco. It’s like something out of the subtler dystopian novels. I can just see Winston Smith, of 1984, standing before a looming poster that proclaims, ‘BIG BROTHER WILL SET YOU FREE FROM TOBACCO!’

I take issue, too, with the statistics quoted in the SGA article. According to Rachel Vierra (as cited in The Tower), senator in SGA and Big Sister to this progressive resolution, “roughly 53,000 non-smoking Americans die from second hand smoke each year.” Really? How is that even remotely verifiable? And keep in mind, we’re talking about a college campus, not a chain smoker’s household. It’s already the case that we cannot smoke indoors or even technically within 25 feet of a campus building (that applies to Pryz staff who step outside for a smoke break). So we’re the angels of death for standing somewhere along your walk from McCort-Ward or Pangborn to the Pryz? Give me a break.

Ms. Vierra (to quote the article once again) “feels that ‘the air will be healthier for everyone who comes to campus to learn or work.’’ Aww. I’m assuming that excludes the 25 percent smoking students and the much higher percentage of smoking staff. But that’s fine. What does it matter, so long as the rest feel liberated and SGA can foist its wisdom on the student body? The huddled masses await your proclamation.